I ~ Mr. Intimacy Issue

Dear Mr. Intimacy Issue,

I am not opposed to casual sex or (anonymous) one-night-stands. I do have one rule though: as long as the sexual encounter lasts, you are mine, and I’ll be yours. I expect you to be present. I expect a certain intimacy, whether tender or raw. This doesn’t mean I want to exclude power dynamics, or humiliation if desired and consensual. This doesn’t mean I want promises for a future. Don’t want to ever see me again afterwards? Fine. But even so, in the moment: be present, be intimate and be mine.

So let me explain to you what lack of intimacy looks like:

H ~ Mr. Hero

Dear Mr. Hero,

Sometimes, in difficult times, the mere thought you exist, makes me less lonely. I guess it’s because of how we met. There aren’t many situations where I feel so alone as when sick. And this particular time it felt as if my body had betrayed me. All it could do was throw up and beg me to lie down on something that didn’t move. Add the fact that I was in a foreign country, with an important train to catch at the other side of the city and you can imagine how lost and lonely I felt. But then, as I sat on that platform waiting for the right train to come, there was you.

G ~ Ms. Girl

Dear Ms. Girl,

I’m so sorry I may have offended you when I told you I wasn’t attracted to your boyfriend. But I just wasn’t. And I’m sorry that this was the reason for me to decline your invitation for a threesome. But I am not sorry for asking you to kiss me.

F ~ Mr. Friend with Benefits

Dear Mr. Friend with Benefits,

You may not be the only lover to have kissed every inch of my body. But every time your lips touch my skin, your attention feels as if you’re seeing me naked for the first time. Your touch, however, betrays the fact that you know my body very well.

The first time, I was inexperienced and insecure. You on the other hand, had probably already lost count of the women you had slept with.

E ~ Mr. Engaged

Dear Mister Engaged,

Let’s just blame it on the tequila. Because we as two adults should have been a lot more responsible. And you, ten years my senior, should definitely have been more responsible.

I understand that you were lonely; on a job here, by yourself, no friends. That is why I gave in to our mutual friend’s request to have a drink with you. And the first time we met, when I asked you about your fiancée, it wasn’t just out of interest. It was also to clear the flirtatious energy building between us. And those first few meetings we did a pretty good job, as we platonically greeted one another, and always went our separate ways.

Oh, but that wretched tequila…